What makes you happy?

Is the Topamax working? I think so, overall. I've had a couple of migraines, but they've responded to my abortives. The chronic daily is all but gone. This makes me happy. But most of all, I think I'm responding to the mood altering effects of the Topamax.

This scares me and makes me happy at the same time.

It makes me happy because I'm in a better mood than I have been in a long time. I feel much more rational, and, to be honest, I feel like I'm treating people better. I look back at some of my interactions with people in the past, and they seem-- well-- downright mean. Could it be that I could have benefitted from an antidepressant or mood stabilizer for all these years? I'm sure there are people out there that have known me for a long time that might read this and shout "YEAH!" but they were either too nice (or too afraid of me) to say anything in the past.

What's scary is the thought that perception of the world, and one's interaction with the world can be so easily guided by a tiny bit of brain chemistry. It doesn't take much to make you feel good or feel bad, and if that chemistry is chronically off, it can send your whole life out of whack. Overall, though, I feel like I'm luck, and that my keel has been relatively even, and the Topa is just helping out over some of the rougher brain chemistry seas.

Until next time, dear friends and readers-- here's wishing you a headache-free day, or a break (be it ever so short) in the cycle of chronic pain.

-Rob